The World According to RGV ...

  • Where it cannot be said that for the want of a power plant, a government is lost.
  • Where a gangster movie evolves into a whodunit.
  • Where the final exposition takes so long, the audience is wishing another murder is in the offing, just to someone out of their misery.
  • Where people talk in slow-motion.
  • Where a glare replaces dialogue or dialogue consists of dubious aphorisms
  • Where characters either speak with hushed menace or scream their guts out.
  • Where time stands still and 2 hours seem like 4.
  • Where CatatoniShek announces that he murdered his brother and NeediWarya whines so what, my mommy died and my daddy doesnt loooove me.
  • Where NeediWarya looks mildly confused after a brutal murder.
  • Where CatatoniShek looks catatonic after a brutal murder
  • Where the dumb audience needs 600 shots of rioting in the streets to indicate a riot is in progress.
  • Where overacting is the norm.
  • Where a camera angle can never be vertical.
  • Where background music has to be burst-the-dumb-audience-eardrums loud.
  • Where an industrialist can hum in the middle of a conversation.
  • Where a death of a family member is not taken personally.
  • Where a glove carries on an entire conversation.
  • Where a criminal's first priority is to douse flaming trees when attacked
  • Where Mr. Bachchan presence does 99.999% of the work to ensure a movie's success.
  • Where he is a great filmmaker.
Needless to say, if you dont inhabit the above world, please spare yourself the torture of watching Sarkar Raj. A non-existent story, coupled with almost excruciating pacing and camerawork and average acting sinks the film. Only Mr. Bachchan manages to shine, but that was always to be expected. I would have written a complete review, but I'm afraid that all I can be is horribly snarky. Rating:

On a happier note, all of Saturday wasnt a total loss. I managed to make my fav 15 min dessert - chocolate pudding. Since all of us at home are on various diets, it got made with low-fat milk (instead of the original coconut), half the chocolate, double the cocoa and with orange rind and rum added to up the flavor loss. Wasnt as rich and chocolatey as the original, but the ramekins were polished off in a matter of minutes. With a lotta less guilt :)


WhatsInAName said...

2 papayas indeed for RGV... Maybe even 2 peanuts would do for him! The review was lovely, by the way. Thank God that the world is still sane! :)

and... *drool* over that yummy pudding! Enjoy :)

S said...

lol, I loved the movie but couldn't agree more with your observations.

btw am on a weight shedding spree so banish all thoughts of cakes n all....



avdi said...

ha ! SR was quite a drag.
If AB could 'see' everything so clearly at the end, why not 'during'? Surely an astute politician like him should have seen thru the gandhian fellow immediately. But then, my funda is 'Ours not to reason why' when watching a bad film and just yawn it away.

Now the diet-choclate pudding is SOMETHING ELSE. What do you say to a gal who turned a potato (no no no ) into a papaya !

Mama - Mia said...

agree with avdi!

if he saw everything so clearly, why couldnt he save his osn's life! its just ridiculous!!

i am apalled at how many people raved about the movie!! M was so upset and so kicked about how perfect FE's revierw was that he came home aand commented on it again at 1am!! :p

there were just few shots that even made you sit up! the dialogues were SO lame!!! its ridiculous!!

and like my pa-in-law in said, a criminal / politician's first reaction when shot is to duck!! NOT save his lady love!! :p

and PLEASE to email the pudding recipe!!! :)



couchpapaya said...

WIAN - lol maybe i shld change the images to peanuts, now that's an idea!! thx.

S - u 'loved' it ?? not just liked, was ok, but loved?? hehe anyways,a couple of days have passed now, so am a bit lukewarm abt it, when i just watched i knew i had to trash the movie somewhere to get some peace of mind!! the dessert is mostly low-fat, even if i think it myself :D


couchpapaya said...

avdi - oh yaaa ur right?! so many senseless things in the movie !! i was still getting over the fact that some back-in-the-woods-wadi can be a center of some great political influence in maharashtra. like u said, whatever .... :D wish i cld be a lauki or something slimmer like that :D

abha - ya, even i went back to reread FE's review and get a good laugh and saw m's comment there :D ur pa-in-law is soo right!! me and b started guffawing when that happened, earning us very dirty looks in the theatre. pudding recipe is linked up above. i dont think i have ur email !! try the original, it's abso yummm and sooo easy!!


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